The case is in its diapers
by Classic-Color
Summary: Suprisingly, the most challenging case in Sherlock's resume, is one that John didn't even bother to mention in his blog. Is it because he found parenting mundane, or does he simply have his hands full doing babysitting chores? Either way, he did say people wanted a proof that Sherlock is human, and documenting Sherlock's life as a father might give them exactly that!
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1**

* * *

Sherlock's a father...

Sherlock's a father...

Sherlock... is a father?

John did everything in his power to ignore the unsettling questions that popped in his head when dealing with this bizarre situation, but to no-avail, the disturbing thoughts just kept coming:

* * *

_Sherlock seduced a woman into bed with him? _

It sounded so unlikely that John feared that Sherlock has forced himself on the poor lady, but the assumption took the weirdness of the scenario to a whole new level ...

* * *

_Sherlock actually managed to keep his mouth shut during the whole process?_

and if he didn't, god help us, what have he said?

* * *

_Sherlock is now going to be the father-figure, the role-model, the inspiration for a little kid?_

Well, that shouldn't be allowed. John still hasn't recovered from the birth of Mycroft's son, Marcus and now that?

There must have been some kind of law that restricted the Holmes' family reproduction.

The world, he was certain, was not yet ready for a league of mini Holmes.

* * *

_A sperm donation, that must be it_.John wanted to believe it so bad.

Unfortunately, Sherlock made his opinion concerning the subject pretty clear, as he once told John that the only organ he was going to donate, was his brain, but not before he was thoroughly done with it himself; "Leaving the world a less ignorant place sounds like a good way to go" as he had said it.

* * *

_So there is no escaping it _John concluded as Sherlock's dictum echoed in his head:

when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, _however_ improbable, must be the truth.

So as improbable as it sounds:

**Sherlock is a father.**

* * *

**A/N:** I'm gonna take this story in baby steps (literally)

I'll start with funny little anecdotes of Sherlock's life as a father, and will develop it into an actual plot.

Perhapes I'll even let you choose the baby name ;)

(All names suggestions must start with an 'S' [a crazy obsession for the S.H. initials I'm afraid])

**Hope you enjoyed**

**~C2**


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2**

* * *

"Sherlock, are you intending to go in there or not?" John jerked his head towards the delivery room.

"What do you take me for? a midwife?" asked Sherlock, the boredom clear in his tone.

"Oh, I don't know... a father maybe?" John suggested in irritation.

"Well, as much as I would love to chase random doctors around the hall and ask them to have a look just in case, then go into the delivery room and hold my love's hand as she is screaming uselessly and senselessly I'm afraid I'll have to pass, since there is already someone else inside doing the "push, push, honey he's almost out" routine.

"Someone el...?! Sherlock! Don't tell she's married. Where's your dignity? Here I am, thinking you were saving your first time for someone special, but... how... Do you have anything to say for yourself?" the very loud lecture turned to a restrained whisper as John rubbed his eyes in despair.

"I didn't know she was married" Sherlock said, obviously aware of how unconvincing it sounded.

John's tone changed once again, turning dangerous and drifting with cynicism:

"Oh yes, I can buy this story; a woman unsatisfied with her marriage, wishes to spice her life up and jumps into the arms of a lover who is completely unaware of her married, I repeat, **married** status.

Convenient, believable even, if I weren't dealing with a man who can read the history of the chewing gum stuck to his shoe sole..."

A baby cry that had suddenly erupted the quite hallway, stopped both John's preaching and Sherlock's attempts to scratch off the gum.

Without another word, Sherlock sprang from his sit and approached the delivery room.

"You stay here" he ordered John who was already behind him.

Sherlock took a deep breath, as if bracing himself to an unfamiliar experience, then disappeared behind the revolving doors.

* * *

**A/N:** I just love writing dialogues involving Sherlock.

He is so brilliantly sarcastic, and his unchanging mood releases the frustrated, cynical beast out of everyone else which creates witty conversations.

The suggestions' box for names is still open for those who're interested by the way.

**Hope you enjoyed**

**~C2**


End file.
